OK, seriously? So, someone ate all of the delicious pretzel chips out of the pretzel chip bag. He or she probably took their nice, large chips and dipped them in something delicious, like garlic sauce or cheese (JK you know it was organic hummus) because of all the extra room on their gigantic, full chip pieces. Then, when she or he got down to the little, undippable chip detritis at the bottom of the bag, rather than try and dip them and risk getting their fingers in the
garlicky cheesy goodness organic hummus, this person dumped the chip-overs on a plate and left it in the kitchen.
I’d be more upset if I hadn’t eaten, like, half of this plate after I took the picture.
OK, so stuff on the free counter isn’t always bad. Case in point: truffles!
OM NOM NOM!!!!
Today, we have a study in dualities.
On the left, we have the very symbol of Corporate America itself: Coca-Cola, perennially the #1 company with the #1 advertising budget. Coke sells you soft drinks and Christmas Polar Bears, teaches the world to sing, and, apparently, cleans your toilet. An entire museum has been erected to in it’s brand-marketed honor. Around the world, people recognize the red label with the white cursive writing almost immediately. Their older branded items are sold as collectible relics of Vintage America.
On the right, we have Whole Foods’ brand Organic Orange Strawberry Banana. This is the very face of the Modern Hippie. Rejecting both labels and preservatives, Whole Foods’ brand Organic Orange Strawberry Banana isn’t proud of its name, but its ingredients. You know its ingredients are worthy of pride by, ironically, its organic name. It represents the shoppers of Whole Foods: those who want to turn away from the giants of the food industry by shopping at a chain that sells 365 instead of Shur-Fine. Their soda is just called Soda and their juice known as Juice. Organic Orange Strawberry Banana stands defiantly next to it’s notorious liquid brother saying, “You don’t know me!!”
These two free counter offerings seem to be polar opposites in taste, substance, and cultural meaning. However, they share one thing in common: both are partially-drunk, half-open leftovers that have been sitting on the counter for hours.
Thanks for the Book Club recommendation, Free Counter! We should discuss really obvious plot points and then devolve into gossip about mutual friends and the Jersey Shore over glasses of white wine together sometime soon.
Here’s something I couldn’t live without — an assortment of oddly-shaped cookie cutters! I often express my love of snowmen, stars, pointing humans and … whatever the hell that thing is on the left via baked good. Also, there’s a cat. So you can have cat cookies. And no friends.
Our first stuff example is a classic. You can tell by the illustrated cover that this book is very scientific and serious. Also, modern. You could learn a lot about Sexual Reproduction from Ms. Susan Michelmore. For example, who knew that fish gave birth to colored marbles? It’s science!